Wednesday, July 20, 2011

What are you going to be when you grow up?

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Shortly I will be returning to work. William is entering preschool this fall and daddy can take him and pick him up. We need money. I know that I have to work and I actually want to return to work. I have all of the normal reservations: I haven't worked in 6 years, will I be able to fall back into it again? Did my mind disintegrate while raising a toddler? The biggest, though, is that I have absolutely no idea what I want to do.

Because of my past, it is relatively unlikely that I will be getting my medical license back again. I'm not even sure that I am mentally up to the task of appearing in front of the board, and I am SO far above and beyond the point where I was when it was taken away. The whole process was incredibly disheartening and debasing and I just don't know . . .

So then, where does that leave me? You know what I love? I love to write this blog. But I make no money doing it. The world of freelance writing is incredibly difficult to get involved in, I've found, and again, there isn't a lot of money in it. I have this amazing education and a diploma from medical school, so I should be able to find a great job that pays well, helps us get out of debt, offers great benefits, etc, but what the heck sort of job is it? I have no clue.

I'm trying to believe that God is my limo driver and he's taking me where I need to be. My head is full of the story of Job, who weathered an indescribable storm and ended up more blessed than he had been in the beginning. I know that I will be more grateful for the things that I took for granted before, like not having to figure out where gas money is going to come from.

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11 comments:

Lois Evensen said...

All the best in your search, Erin. You never know where you next lead may take you....

Hugs,
Lois

Jamie said...

I'm at the same place you are, work wise.
Unsure and nervous.
BUT I know life is short so I will be aiming to do something that makes ME happy, something I WANT to do and LIKE it.
Question is... what?

Trust the cosmos, it'll lead you where you need/want to be. That I'm sure of.
Let us know when/what you decide!

Grace Notes said...

Having worked my entire adult life except for maternity leave, I can't imagine not having a job for that long! I'll be praying for you to find the job God has for you, something you will enjoy and be good at!

By the way, I really like your blog design.

Ellen said...

New follower here! We specialize in educational greeting cards for kids and would love to have you stop by! http://letterlearning.blogspot.com Thanks! Ellen

Ann On and On... said...

I'm sure your driver will lead you in the right direction.

It's a great time to follow what you love.

:)

Myrna R. said...

I am certain you will find a great job. Sharpen up your confidence, it took great skill and wisdom to care for a todler. You learned much, though you may not think so. Good luck!

Hello I'm Lala! said...

Best of luck to you!! It is very hard going back to work after 6 years and uncertain as to which direction to go. (Might as well be 21 and back in college). LOL.
I'm really thinking about going to Grad school within the 2 years. I FINALLY have decided on what I want to be when I grow up. 30 year process ;-)

Amy said...

I'm so sorry to hear about your financial troubles. --And I completely understand your anxiety about re-entering the job world. I will be praying for you.

janis said...

Erin~ Im almost 50 and Im still trying to figure it out!
When my babies were born I stopped working full-time, dolbled with... Avon, Tupperware, Babysitting, Pre-School Teaching, Lunch-Room Lady, & After School Care.
Then when the girls started their pre-teen yrs I became a Realtor for eight years.
Then when they started college & I needed a better stable income I went into clerical.
Now, I am finally doing something I love, even though it pays crumming & hours are not exactly what I would prefer.
Follow your heart.
God will guide you.
My prayers will also be sent up for you.

Love to you♥
btw~ you opened a can a worms... why would you not want to go back in to a medical field? That seems to be the one area that is in demand here anyway.

Jamie said...

I'll send up prayers for an easy job search and some inspiration for where to start.

Unknown said...

I so know where you are coming from. I have owned my own portrait studio for 26 years and we lost our house where my studio was. The economy and technology has changed the photography industry so I am now over 50 looking for work. I too am trusting God that He will lead me to the job that is right for me although right now I'd just like a job. Good luck to you.

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